I have a lot of strong, amazing women in my life and I thought it would be great to talk about them when I can and our history together.
This is Marisa. I’ve known her roughly since I was like 7 or 8 years old. We lived down the street from each other and went to the same school but didn’t really know each other until our parents made us say hi. We both can’t agree on how we first met, I say there was a dog and I think she says there was a bike. Who knows.
We both have older sisters a couple or so years older than us. She’s technically a year younger, but her mom managed to get her into school a year early so she could be with her sister. It was a good choice because I wouldn’t have met her.
Marisa was my very first friend. I was a shy, introverted kid who read a lot and stayed indoors. She was a happy ball of sunshine and we played Pokemon, watched Sailor Moon and Dragonball Z, and would act out adventures on our bikes.
Our favorite memory is one time when a giant dust storm was hitting, you could see this wall of dirt coming for our street. We were racing up and down on our bikes when my dad runs outside and yells at us to get inside the house. It was dramatic and like the movie Twister and we swear that we pedaled as fast as we could and made it inside right as that giant wall of dirt hit as my dad shut the screen door.
Our childhood is probably a lot more exciting in our minds than it actually was.
When I was 9, my parents divorce and we moved with my mom to Dallas. I was more upset about leaving my dad and Marisa than the actual move. I had a hard time adjusting and like I previously talked about, got depressed. Marisa would write me letters and doodles and we wrote back and forth for years. I actually got a cellphone rather young so I could talk to my dad, because I walked home from school, and so I could talk to her. Back then we had to talk after 9pm when minutes were free, but we tried to catch up as much as possible.
In the summer, I would stay for a month at my dad’s and spend the whole time hanging out. It felt like nothing changed. We played Kingdom Hearts and Crash Bandicoot and talked about fan fiction and cartoons. She would catch me up on friend drama and I’d tell her about my school. We’d stay over at each other’s houses and try to make horror movies with an old camcorder and read about ghosts.
I moved back to Lubbock to live with my dad when I was 12 or 13. Since I had good grades, I got to pick my school and went to the same one as Marisa. She introduced me to all her friends and showed me the ropes. Her friends became my friends and it was this whole big group of people. She attracted everyone to her even if she barely knew them. Everyone knew her.
We hit high school and got older. I had a disaster of a first boyfriend and she was there for me. Crushes came and went. Friends left. High school drama. She learned to drive first and it was like a mini-panic attack every time. One time she hit a bump and our friend bounced up so high she hit her head on the roof.
Her birthday is November 1st so we’d celebrate every Halloween and I’d make her a cake to eat at midnight. Our family’s got along a knew each other and sometimes we’d both go with our dads to movies or even accidentally run into each other going to the same one. There were many action moves.
Our first “road trip” was to a small town an hour or so away. She got her first ticket on that trip. We didn’t know what her insurance card look like so he just gave her a warning. That trip her and our friend also accidentally got maced because we thought pepper spray was only a liquid. They maced a rock (I had climbed higher onto a ledge) and then started crying and coughing as it hit the air around them.
It was good times.
We went to college together. I tried to go for Video Game Design and she tried for Nursing. We both realized that it wasn’t for us. I dropped out but she continued, switching to try to be a social worker. She’s a good listener and likes to help people. I think it would suit her well.
When I moved out on my own, she moved into the apartment next to me. I got her a kitten and we named him Loki. He’s kind of a jerk, but can be pretty lovable if he warms up to you. She helped me through my second heartbreak, was there at every art gallery, and when I was sad or lost, would hug me until I was okay.
We both joined roller derby together. We learned fast and made a lot of friends. It’s a commitment but we would go to practice together and the different events and hang out with the girls. I got hurt right before our first bout but she was wonderful. We ended up playing against each other at a mash-up bout (Gene Simmons vs Richard Simmons) and we trash talked each other and had fun hitting and blocking one another. I hurt my knee and had to stop but she kept on and was so good.
We moved into an apartment together a year or so later. It was a weird apartment complex with shady neighbors and a horrible parking lot. I started vlogging every day and then we tried to make a sketch show series. We did 3 episodes but it wasn’t too bad. She was in my vlogs a lot under her roller derby name Goldie Han Solo. People jokingly called us Gaico.
We moved into a house and got another cat. I painted the walls blue and put Doctor Who quotes up. She started working as a waitress and would tell me all the crazy stories that working in the food industry and I’d tell her Emergency Room stories after my shifts. Marisa has a weird thing about food where she leaves only a tiny bit of food left but will put it away for later. I would constantly find like an inch of Little Debbie snacks in the pantry, a single chicken nugget in the fridge, or when she was trying to hide it, a bite of hamburger in the cutlery drawer. She would never finish it either.
I could make a new house out of all the bites of food she would leave.
Our first road trip was to Santa Fe and then to Austin. We stayed in weird, shady hotels and visited museums and took weird pictures and ate Star Fruit because we are Kingdom Hearts nerds. When we were driving to Santa Fe at night, I accidentally turned off the headlights on a hill while trying to switch it to my high beams. She screamed like she was being murdered and I laughed so hard my stomach hurt.
We’ve had more adventures than I can count or remember. I moved out a few years ago and got my own place after starting to date Rony. She was there in the beginning and I was so overjoyed when they got along. When I got Almond, she helped me with her and then ended up with a dog too that looked just like her. Almond and Cooper are best friends now too.
The beauty of our friendship is that we are sisters. I don’t need to constantly be texting her or calling her for us to be close. We’ll hang out or text or bitch about people in our lives. We’ll tag each other in stuff on Facebook. We’re there for every birthday and event and support each other. Not everything we agree on, but we get each other and know when it matters to be there for each other.
We’ll have been friends almost 20 years. I’ve gotten the pleasure of spending 20 years of my life with this bright, glowing star of a person. I don’t know how I could have managed to get this far in my life without her and she constantly inspires me and has my back and I wanted to show her how amazing, beautiful, and courageous she is.
She’s my #woman crush everyday ;)
You don’t always need a giant group of friends. You just have to find that one that will pretend to be a Sailor Scout with you and buy you flowers when you’re heartbroken. Luckily, I have that.