It’s like a love story but with more Halloween and cats.
Today is mine and Rony’s 3 year anniversary. Sometimes time goes by so fast and sometimes it also feels like forever.
About 4 years ago, me and Marisa did Geek Trivia nights at our house. We did them once a month and each one had themes. At first it was just a few of our friends then friends of friends came and eventually we’d end up with 20-25 people in the house playing in teams. Rony was a friend of a friend and came to one of these trivia nights. I didn’t actually talk to him at all that night, except to take a picture because we had dressed as the same cartoon character.
I had just chopped off all my hair, was working the night shift at the Emergency Room, and was trying to figure out what I wanted to do. Me, being me, I made the trivia nights.
I think he only came by a couple more times but I still didn’t really talk to him. He was quiet and my limit for meeting new people is low when there’s a bunch at the house.
A year or so passed and eventually we stopped doing trivia nights because they were too time consuming. Everyone that went to them friend requested each other and chatted outside the events and I always thought that was cool. One day, Rony messages me and asks if I want to come over to a board game night at his house.
I think sure and me and Marisa go.
We had fun and ended up playing Werewolf, Love Letter, and Cosmic Encounter. Afterwards we discovered the cats escaped and me and Marisa had to hunt them down all over the neighborhood.
We would comment on Facebook about stuff but I didn’t think he had any interest in me. It didn’t even cross my mind until later.
I posted online about not wanting to go to First Friday Art Trail by myself (last time I did I got stranded downtown after dark because the buses quit early) and he volunteered to go with me. We met up and made fun of some of the art, his old squeaky truck, and how he got awkwardly cornered in a room with an interviewer talking about Breaking Bad.
The next day he comes over and we play almost through the entirety of the first Metal Gear Solid on PSOne without saving because I didn’t have a memory card. He ends up accidentally getting us killed and Game Over’d during the torture scene after hours of playing.
We hang out and watch movies, play games at his house, and he teaches me and Marisa MTG.
I pretty much lived in a state of “does he like me as a friend or more” the whole time we hung out for a month or two. Finally we both admit we do like each other but we’ll be friends for a bit first.
We hang out and read comics and I play magic with him and watch soccer. Pumpkaboo is an angry little furball who tries to swipe at my feet any time I walk around her. We text when I go out of town to Austin and then end up being together. It wasn’t for another month or so that we actually do confirm we are together because I am an awkward weirdo who needs verbal affirmation.
We like the same things. Comics and video games and horror movies and art. We send things back and forth on Spotify and give each other suggestions on things to check out. He pushes me to try and do galleries again and draw more and he listens to me rant about women in comics and feminism.
There are ups and downs. It’s been years and years since I’ve been in a relationship and have been fiercely independent. I’ll freely admit that I am stubborn, easily frustrated, and not that empathetic while he is kind to a fault and feels freely. If someone is upset I try to find solutions to fix their problems while he can comfort and soothe emotions.
He learns to deal with my anxiety and depression and I learn to deal with his stress coping mechanisms and the way he doesn’t stress about deadlines until 24 hours before when he stresses too much.
For my birthday, 6 months in, I invite him to go to New Orleans with me. He says yes and we spend almost a week in a hostel exploring the city. It’s wonderful. He goes with me to Staple in Austin and helps me start the first Ladies Night. Pumpkaboo and Ryder gets introduced to each other and eventually she starts to stay at the house with me.
We spend almost every day with each other.
He is goofy and not afraid to act silly when I have problems doing anything that might not be seen as dignified. I’m still trying to let loose a bit. He sings in the car, quotes Louis CK and Mitch Hedberg, and eats constantly without gaining weight.
Despite how serious and “intimidating” (so he says), I am a romantic and likes cheesy romance things while he’s cynical about that sort of thing. We both LOVE Halloween and horror movies and going to see new things.
Sometimes he would get annoyed at my constant need to help stray animals, but now it’s rubbed off on him. We help birds all the time, will try to find owners to lost dogs, and feed stray cats and kittens when we can.
When we got Almond, he fell in love with her. He hasn’t stopped hugging her since.
Seriously, he is in a constant snuggle pile.
We love taking trips and visiting new places together. When I started doing comic conventions, Rony would go with me and help. I don’t think either of us like sitting still and need to constantly be doing something.
Birthdays and anniversaries and holidays are always big deals. We find reasons to spoil each other and now it’s been turned into a competition. Each of us try to find things that will “win” us Christmas or Birthdays. Big parties, lots of presents, emotional gifts. We take note of things to give each other that the other won’t expect.
I think we just like making each other happy too much.
Any time there is opportunity to dress up we both like going crazy. I don’t make fun of him if he wants to dress like a girl or asks me to do his costume makeup. He gets genuine joy out of dressing up and I love that about him.
2 years in we decided to move in together. We both lived across town from each other and it was hard going back and forth almost every day. We’d basically been staying with one another since the beginning of our relationship. We spent a few months searching and ended up with a house thanks to a friend. It had a huge yard for Almond, 3 bedrooms so each of us could have an Office, and a big living room and washer/dryer. We signed the lease that week.
Living together was easy. It didn’t feel any different than before with the exception that we felt free to do our own thing. It was always an effort to go visit one another and then we felt like we had to be focused on one another. This way we were together but could do what we wished.
We decorated the dining room with our Halloween collection. He doesn’t mind that I collect animal skulls or sometimes stay in bed and watch Youtube all day. I’ve gotten use to his after work routine of playing video games, organizing stuff, and eating 3 bowls of cereal. When I want to start a new project or event, he’s my first supporter asking what I need.
3 years have gone by so fast, but I feel like I’ve known him forever. Fights are brief and talked through, we debate and argue about topics all the time, but can switch to being weird and goofy in a blink of an eye.
I’m so incredibly lucky to have found someone who gets me and is so kind and creative and just as ambitious. We are best as a team and I am happiest when I’m with him and our weird family of animals in our Pumpkin House. And I hope there are so many years to come with this goober.